Is your marriage on the rocks? If so, then you might be worried about the possibility of divorce. The thought of ending your marriage might riddle you with uncertainly, leaving you fearful of what the future holds. You might also worry about navigating the legal intricacies of a marriage dissolution and ensuring an outcome that protects your post-divorce stability.
While there are some issues to be concerned about as you navigate your divorce, you should try to focus on the positives that will likely come from the process. They can be hard to see when you’re wrapped up in the emotional aspects of ending your relationship, so let’s analyze a few of them here so that you can remind yourself of what you can achieve by finding your way out of a toxic marriage.
The benefits of getting a divorce
A divorce will change your life, and there’s a good chance that it’ll do so for the better. Here are some of the benefits that ending your marriage might bring to you:
- Financial independence: If you feel like your spouse controls your finances during your marriage, then you might get a breath of fresh air once your divorce is finalized. Although your standard of living might be less than what you experienced during your marriage, at least you’ll be able to spend your money as you see fit. By creating a post-divorce budget, you can work toward the goals that are important to you.
- Overall freedom: Once your divorce is finalized, you’re no longer tied to your spouse’s vision of the future and their interests. Instead, you’re free to rediscover yourself and the things that are important to you. You can set new goals, take up new hobbies, or return to interests that were put on the shelf during your marriage. Your life post-divorce truly is what you make of it.
- Renewed social interconnectedness: During your marriage, you might’ve felt cutoff from your social network. Time with family members and friends might’ve been limited, and as a result close relationships may have deteriorated. After your divorce, though, you’ll have the time to rebuild those relationships and expand your social support.
- Better environment for your children: Even if you think that you hid the toxicity in your marriage from your children, there’s a good chance that they knew what was going on. And if your marriage was marred by domestic violence, abuse, or substance use, then getting divorced may be necessary to keep your kids safe. Once your marriage is dissolved, then, you can provide your children with the home that they deserve, giving you the ability to build the future you want for them. This can leave your children happier and healthier.
- Stronger self-confidence: When you’re trapped in a failing marriage, it’s hard to see the good things about yourself. One you’re divorced, though, it’s easier to feel better about yourself and the things that you’re doing in life. This can generate stronger self-confidence which, in turn, can lead to a healthier overall life.
Is divorce right for you?
Ultimately, only you can answer this question. But it’s one that you should make with a full understanding of what the process can and can’t do for you. You want to make a fully informed decision with recognition of the risks and rewards involved. But if you need help analyzing your circumstances and understanding what marriage dissolution can do for you, then wrap yourself in support and seek out any additional guidance you may need.
Also, take comfort knowing that the process doesn’t have to be as contentious as you think. So, consider whether collaborative divorce is a more peaceful solution for you to get through your marriage dissolution.